Living the Risky Life -Oprah, cars, and tow trucks

I heard a sermon yesterday that inspired me to live the risky life. So this morning, instead of starting off fresh and early on a project for school, I decided to email Oprah. That's right, it took me over an hour and I had to write everything in less than 2000 characters, but it was worth it and I had some valuable things to share with her. I can't tell you what I wrote because she'll read it on her show soon... OR maybe even have me go on her show. Highly likely. Wouldn't that amazing... something different for a change. I felt pretty good about it.

Anyhow, this evening, I was sitting in my car around 6pm waiting for awhile since there was the usual accident blocking the roadway. Here's the question of the day: Why in the world are people so self centered? I wanted to get over one lane to the right because my lane turned left (and NO I didn't know that it turned left). Of course, noone let me in. I even honked to get the attention of the car next to me. Well the first guy, TOTALLY ignored me, as if he didn't hear my honks (they weren't mean ones but I honked enough that he heard it), the next white haired guy, totally ignored me too... these were acceptable although not favorable, but the last lady, I gave a honk and she started giving me attitude, almost as if she was chanting, "You are NOT going in my lane. I've been here for hours and you are NOT going in my lane." Her neck was moving all funny and all. If you're one of those people who don't let others in, I have the feeling you're also the type of person who considers everyone who doesn't do what you want on the road a bad driver. WELL, maybe you should consider that you're the bad driver because you are evil and don't let people on the road. Did you BUY the lane you're in? Did you BUY the entire road? Did you even ADOPT the road?!? I will have to post these questions on my window the next time I encounter people like I did today.

Related to road injustice, a tow truck around that same time drove by traffic on the right edge of the road. I'm assuming it was getting to the accident. The second question for the day is... Isn't it sad that tow trucks spend most of their time driving on the edge of the road? Isn't that bad for the tires? And isn't it even sadder that tow truck drivers only see beat up cars or ones that are illegally parked? I think they must be like the farmers.. they probably deserve more respect. The one thing that is pretty cool is that they like policemen have lights, just not the red and blue ones, but at least they get to drive through traffic and defy traffic laws once in awhile. I guess that evens things up...

If You Can't Study

If you can't study or you're just not motivated, I'm finding that the next best thing is to bake or cook something.  At least I'm doing something productive right?? One of my favorite things to do is to make or bake something with something I already have. WHALAAA, that's exactly what happened in the last two or three days.  Leftover turkey?  Chocolate chips and flour anyone??

As I mentioned, I do in fact have a paper for my Global Health course due in a little bit, but when you discover an amazing recipe, it's hard to stay focused. So I easily strayed from my boring Word Doc the other day to two of the coolest, tastiest, and best recipes online.  

Me!?!??  A cooking maniac?  Yes, I would have laughed only a few months back hearing this (My huz is actually the gourmet chef) , but I'm really starting to get the hang of what I'll term "google cooking".   Both recipes that I'm sharing are a result of this technique and I have to say, things are going very well.  

How to "google cook": Type in "Best" and "(the food you'd like to cook/bake). If you really want to kill it, type in "Very best" or "amazing".  They all work.

Below are a turkey pot pie recipe and the best big fat chewy chocolate chip cookie recipe.  The cookies taste BEST oven fresh.  Go ahead, impress yourself!  Yum yum!

http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Turkey-Pot-Pie-III/Detail.aspx

http://allrecipes.com/recipe/best-big-fat-chewy-chocolate-chip-cookie/detail.aspx

Turkey and Mrs. Tom

I'm learning what it means to sacrifice and humble yourself for the sake of encouraging another. When I was about 10 or maybe even younger, I began slugging/running the BCC Turkey Chase with my parents and sisters.  Since then, I've probably run about 10 other Turkey Chase races sometimes with large caboodles of inspired friends and a few times alone.  I'm dedicated to this race.  Thanksgiving just isn't Thanksgiving unless I get a good run, whether in hot, cold, or even rainy weather. I've tried all three temperatures and every year, it reminds me of how good it feels to be healthy and able to run. 

In college, I quickly realized that I was capable of running further than the basic 2 miler.   Since then, I've run the 10k which is 6.2 miles and have graduated onto longer races even. I call myself a runner and quite proud of it.  Strangely, after the July nuptials, I haven't had the marathon/presidential discipline I typically have.  I feel lumpy now like a sack of sleepy potatoes.  

So this year, I convinced Kevin to run the 2 miler, which took some convincing might I say, and I as a married woman, signed up for the 2 miler as well.  That's right, I signed up for the 2 miler and while my desire and love would be to run the 10k, I decided to run with my man because he would like me to run with him.  In some ways, I'm embarrassed, hoping that none of my running friends from my club will see me. At the same time, I'm glad to get to run this race in whatever capacity and to have my man run it with me.   While he typically gets sick quite often, I'm glad to say that he has not gotten sick, despite the fact that he is teaching coughing germy buger filled 2nd graders.  If that's what it takes for a man to succeed, maybe it is worth it.  Maybe. 

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

(Photo: Julia helping me model one of many turkey chase shirts. )

I totally admit that this itandkt blog is not really about kevin and I, it's about me. I think I just like to blog or write and I was using our wedding as a reason to create another blog. Well, cheers to that.

Lately, life has been pretty chill. In some ways, I feel like I'm not busy enough because I find myself sitting on the couch just to sit and sleeping average recommended hours. Part of me is ready to volunteer, run the next marathon, and call someone up to catch up to fill the time, but the other half of me holds me back telling me that I need to learn how to just sit and do nothing and enjoy silence, solitude and chilling!

My busy bee mentality is simply a result of being born of the ultimate busy bee. My mother is by far the most productive person ever. She wastes not even seconds and she is no doubt effective, but very busy. I remember growing up, there was always something to do in the house. One time while I came home for a college break, I remember sitting on the couch watching TV and feeling guilty when my mom looked down in the family room at me. She might have asked me if I had something else better to do. Whatever the case, the women in my family are pretty quick, proactive aka busy women. Now you would think that being productive is a good quality to have, especially in the workng world. In reality it means that you do twice as much work in half the time and end up giving your company a coupon for all the work you did. And it also means that when you get home and lay down for a nap, you feel lazy! What a horrible horrible thing...
sigh.=)

A Good View

It's been a rough week where I have felt things have been thrown in my direction from all sides. Relationships with family, friends, school, they've all been a pretty big mess.  Despite all that, I have to say a good view can make all the difference and really has the impact to calm the soul. I'm at peace and I'm truly thankful for that. God is my ultimate sustainer. Kevin is second on that list. 

Some people want a big home with a great kitchen and all.  While I only have two bedrooms and one bath, I think I've gotten as big a home as I want and a great kitchen to go with it.  Add the beautiful view and I've got the ice cream with OREOS and 10 cherries on top.   When we first were looking at places to buy, I was deeply attracted to this condo.  Kevin was attracted to the new gas stove while I on the other hand, "loved the view!" With five sliding windows, the light streams in every morning, starting my day off just right.   

Right now, I'm working on a project for class and while it is "work" I can't complain because the sky is angelicly bluish white and the trees seem so content as they're slowly changing color. Yeah for beautiful views and for changing seasons.  Here's a peak at my current view in bad camera quality.  

The Children in My Life

It's been two months since I got married and really it doesn't feels like I'm not married.  I don't think I've realized yet that I'm not going home when this semester ends.  

Miss getting to play with Julia and Jonathan when I want to take a study break. The other day I dropped by home for a visit.  When my oldest niece Julia was about two, she started coming to find me in my room.  Right before I moved out, she would still come to my room and say things like "I gotta a question for you" or "I have a secret to tell you Yi Yi".   

This time when I went back home for a visit, I ran downstairs to gather some things from my old room. Next thing I knew, little Jonathan was coming down the stairs on his own saying "Yi yi, yi yi" meaning Auntie.   He came in my room and started exploring, just like Julia.  Too cute for me to handle.  Maybe God knew I would never be able to study with so many distractions.  

The closest I get to this is hearing the kids who live above us running upstairs.  They're more like giant kids though.  I am thankful for our new place.  OK, here's a picture when my two favorite cuties came to my house to hang for the night. They ate baked ziti, blew bubbles on the balcony, jumped on our bed, and of course as you can see we played in the coolest walk in closet ever known to man.  Julia and I had dance parties in the closet, and Jonathan stayed on our bed, enamored with this one light he kept turning on and off. What a blast. My grandma even joined the party=). Well, check out these two cuties, another one is on the way.=) 

"How to Be a Domestic Goddess"

I plan on buying this book sometime. I heard about it when I went to my friend Kerri's bridal shower.  Apparently, the girl who bought it for her was baking something with Kerri when they smelled something burning.   Who knew? They left the book on the stove top and ended up burning it.

My biggest fear before getting married was having to cook for the Mr.  It's not that he's ungrateful, but he is practically a professional cook himself and I've always felt stress when he mentioned the idea of me cooking for him in the future.  It's okay when your man can't cook a lick, but when his skills excel your own, that's some pressure I tell you.  Surprisingly, I think I'm becoming quite the domesticate.  I'm enjoying it alot too, except the fact that I have no time for running. 

Last week, I decided to surprise Kevin and rather than making spaghetti like I said I would, I decided to attempt to make meatloaf.  He stayed at work real late and I just remember him craving meatloaf the day before.   The only thing was I've never eaten meatloaf, cared too much for it, and I'd definitely never made it.  So being the smart woman that I am, I did what I always do when I cook. I googled!  I googled "best easy meatloaf" and although I messed up the recipe or I mean, "decided not to follow the recipe", it ended being a huge success. When I pulled the meatloaf out of the oven, I actually thought I screwed it up, but apparently Kevin said it looked fine. In my opinion, meatloaf is a piece of cake to make. It also looks like a pound of poo. Anyways, he was really impressed, had three servings, and said it was one of the best meatloafs he had.   All power to google!

New Things

The wedding and honeymoon are over. It's hard to believe and actually it feels like it just flew by or maybe never happened.  Maybe that's just because I haven't gotten any pictures back, haven't written too many thank you cards, and well, I think I know many of Kevin's quirks already, so in that way things haven't changed.  

On the other hand, a lot has changed.  I can truly tell you that I never thought marriage is what it is like now or will be.  While we were dating we didn't get into too many the past few years, but when you get married, it's funny how things change.   Kevin and I have definitely gotten into our first marital fights but it's not just that.  I began reading this book given to us by THE "Theo Lai" called "Sacred Marriage" and basically it says that marriage is not meant to make us happy. God uses it to make us holy. It all is starting to make sense now.  AHA moment!

This morning Kevin and I had an argument. It was big and I felt conflicted inside because half of me hated him and the other half knew that I had promised to "cherish" him like I said in my wedding vows.   I was so angry because Kevin really was telling me things about myself that I was like UGHhh!!  Basically he reminded me that I can be prideful, condescending, etc. etc.  That's when I realized that I think God uses marriage not to make us happier, but really to make us holier.  Honestly, that's not why I got married and I doubt anyone gets married simply to become holy, but really it makes sense.  That is probably why people end up separating so often. They get married hoping to be happy but really they don't realize that marriage is a relationship that is used to sharpen and challenge us to make us holier and closer to God.

So basically in my mind, it seems that in these next many years, God is going to use the closest person to me, my best friend, and the guy who I rate 10++++  on the scale of hotness to tell me the truth of my sin.  Instead of using some random person, Kevin's going to be the brave soul who is going to reveal to me my selfishness, my impatience, and the list continues on.   Knowing that this married life is meant to make me holier, it's a pretty startling and scary note to self that there will be many fights, many sharpenings, many battles that are meant to be there to make me more like God.   Hmmm..  What I'm realizing is that I really didn't sign up for this (I knew there'd be fights...but this is bigger, holiness).  And even more, I'm realizing that I barely have any idea of what marriage and being holy really mean.   I didn't know I signed up for so much, but I have a feeling that was all in the plan.  Here's to many years... cheers=) 

3 Days and Counting... (edited with pictures)

According to the counter on at our wedding website, it says there are THREE days until Kevin and I get married.  Are you serious?? There must be something wrong with counter.  It seems kind of soon doesn't it? 

Highlights

This weekend, my extremely skilled bridesmaids showed that they are quite the party planners. Oh my goodness, I had SO MUCH fun and had a million laughs.   I felt so loved and enjoyed time with some amazing wild women in my life.=)  Yes, WILD.  Kevin made a guest appearance thanks to my maid of honor, Winyan SooHoo, who put together the most hilarious video.   The theme of the shower was "Prettiest food, cutest gift, and wildest dress". Guess who won the wild dress contest? Of course, my mother herself!  I always knew she was a wild one and well, she definitely beat the competition hands down. My sisters could barely compete.   

With three days left until the "BIG" day, I plan to enjoy myself and spend time with my family and friends.  So far, so good.  Today, Kevin and I settle for our first new home.=) My mom has appointed a clean up team to get our new place ready... lucky for my sister and brother in law, they're the first appointed to that team=).

Well, the day must start, so stay posted for pictures from the shower!

A Wedding PARTTTAY

If you know me, I love cards so when I made up my mind who I wanted to be in my bridal party, I decided I'd have to ask in an inventive and creative way, which in my mind translated to making a card.  I also didn't want anyone to reject my invite to be part of my bridal party. So, of course, I made it easy and gave them only two options.  What a shock, they all accepted! 

I'm quite proud of this card in fact.  Love the colors and the verbiage=) AND...just in case you're wondering, I'm no procrastinator, so I sent this card out early on in the planning process, not this week.

PICTURES

Here's a quick picture taken by the one and only Julia Tam. She's our flower girl and one of the only people (children) we've found capable of taking good pictures of Kevin and I. Actually, all our best pictures together are taken by this four, I mean four and a half year old. (I could've gotten in so much trouble for that!)

Kevin and I did have a photo shoot a few weeks ago where we took "engagement pictures." We are quite sophisticated.=)  Those are on the way...

Oh How Things Work Out

Freak out time, it's less than a month until the wedding!!

Quite the contrary (PRAISE THE LORD!) because while things are moving a little quicker, everything, even the small itsy bitsy details are working out.   

A few months back when I was making the wedding invitations, I actually messed them up and printed all of the invites with the wording about an inch off.  It didn't look horrible, and most people said (at least in the back of their minds), what's the big deal?  While I tried to let others console me, I have to say, when it comes to designing something, an inch makes all the difference.   So I decided to reprint them and thanks to Kinkos of Rockville, I reprinted the invites at no extra cost and even got to keep the cardstock from the misprints.  GOOD DEAL!

As a daughter of a true environmentalist, I couldn't put that cardstock to waste! So I saved all 200 invitations.  Well they've been sitting queitly in this white envelope for a few months, but just the other day I was contemplating how I could make table cards for the reception without having to buy anything and what do you know?  It came across my mind to take the cardstock from my misprints to make table cards.  AMAZING idea. Not only is the paper already cut to size, all I had to do was fold them in half!  While I know many of you must be holding onto the edge of your seats dying to see these tablecards, I'm sorry, but you'll have to wait.   The wedding is only about 3 weeks away.=)

Miss you!

Today is June 15th, three days before a month to Kevin and my wedding.  A bittersweeeet time...I'm so excited to be married to Kevin and ready for this next step in our relationship, yet I know moving out permanently will be a big transition.  I went with my grandma out and about today. I figured she needs to get out of the house sometimes and so we went to the mechanic, Michaels, AC Moore, and CVS to finish some errands.  A lot of my day is spent with her, and when i hang out with my grandma, I have to say, i enjoy it just as much if not more than hanging out with peers of mine.  If it was possible, maybe I should have made her a bridesmaid. After all, we are tight. 

The two little kiddies that I live with are quite cute as well and what can say? Although I don't enjoy waking up to a stampede every morning and wailing and "MOMMMY" tantrums at 7am in the morning, it's an even tradeoff since these kids are way too cute.  Here's the photoshoot my supposed-to-be-in-bed nephew just took with me.  Yes, check out Kevin and my ever so cute ring bearer.  

Thank you.. ummmm...

Today we got the biggest package from Amazon and after opening it to find a breadmachine, Kevin and I pretty much dived into the box trying to find some slip of paper to let us know who gave it to us.  Isn't that sad? Someone gave us such a nice and thoughtful gift, yet we have no idea who gave it to us.  Well if anyone knows, please let us know.  The reward will be a loaf of freshbread=).

Almost one month until the wedding and things are going pretty well. I feel really really blessed because every step of the planning has ended up going so smoothly.  I feel like everyone's gifts are totally being utilized and the people who are helping us in all aspects are so talented and loving in how they are sharing their gifts with us. Just took engagement pictures this weekend at Great Falls.  Our photographer is Dan Wong, a newbie to CP church, but a good new friend of Kevin and mine. We spent almost 4 hours at Great Falls this weekend and even intended taking pictures at the same log where Kevin proposed to me.  The sad part of the story is we hiked probably over a mile to the log only to realize it is no longer there!!  OH MY goodness... I was supposed to show my children that log.  Now the only people who have seen it are Mike Huang, Mark Lai, and Joey Sung. Lucky guys I tell you.

Leaving home

Ever since I got engaged back in November 08, I've realized that the hardest part about leaving home will be leaving family.  This is a picture of my grandma and if you can tell, even at 94, she is quite the social butterfly. 

Probably the main reason leaving home is difficult is that my grandma continues to remind me almost every day if not multiple times within a day of how sad she'll be when I leave.  It's inevitable that I'll hear her slowly making her way down the stairs, plop down on the couch wherever I am and then tell me that once I leave, she'll never get to see me.  "Once you leave there will be few chances to see you." over and over...

I try to explain to her that I'll be living close by. I'm not moving to Mexico goodness!  Anyways, having lived at home for 26 years so far, the transition will probably be tough on them, but I'm hoping my grams and I can chat on the phone periodically if not see each other face to face.  

TWO MONTHS!

Let's all say hooray because my crazy wild semester is OFFICIALLY over.  I'm running on four hours of sleep, but strangely I'm not tired (I guess I'll find out tomorrow). The real celebration is because yesterday was my birthday, yeah!, but also the TWO MONTH mark to the wedding. And now that school is OVER, I can actually think about the wedding a little=).

To add to that, Kevin and I will soon be able to spend more quality time (QT) together. His semester is almost over too. This year has been crazy but blessed as we've both been studying like mad dogs and our phone conversations aren't allowed to drift into the night.  Kevin has school in the morning, I have mine at night and finally in only a little, we'll be able to hang and enjoy each other's company alot more.  

Excited to get married, but also excited because at weddings everyone you never see yet love comes together.  I know Kev and my wedding will be quite a celebration and even though I'm not the frills and fancy type, I'm just excited.=) Here's a before picture of the bride and groom (Yes I'm wearing my Ape shall never kill ape shirt)... two months baby!...oh my goodness, is that possible??

Early morning thoughts

It's almost two months until the "big" day.  I know I'm only 25, to be 26, and what do I know about marriage, but I don't feel like I'm on cloud nine about being married. I have been reminded this week that it is the most challenging relationship that we can have on earth.  That's a bit crazy, uhhh yeah, but thank God because I love challenges and I love Kevin. =)  I believe we're going make a pretty crazy couple.

To prepare for this big step in my life, I really really think that I'm going to have to remember God's love and focus on his power, strength, and energy through the coming weeks.  Hopefully everyday I can have sweet quality time with God.  Darn it, weddings are stressful, but I hope especially in the weeks drawing up to the wedding that I'd be calm cool AND extra excited=) But really no stress in the frills..

I'm at peace though with getting MARRIEd mostly because I see that God has prepared me in many ways to be a good wife. I'm not going to be perfect because I can be bossy, strong willed and selfish, and I can stab with my words no joke, but I feel like I've had a lot of experience butting heads with people I love and have had much training in how to love others despite how they treat me.  Plus I have many great models to follow after.  Feel like God has put in me great perseverance to never quit, which I hear is important.  

Finishing up the semester in these last two weeks, just sent out invites, and have premarital counseling tomorrow. Oh yes, it'll get done!

By Far the Most Difficult Day

Today has been by far the most difficult day in trying to get my work done.  Usually I'm pretty task oriented but I have a final paper due for one of my classes next week not to mention many other final papers and exams to study for, but instead tonight, I spent hours looking for comfortable shoes to wear with my wedding dress. 

Who am I kidding? I hate shopping for shoes.  Look at what wedding planning can do to a person!

In addition to these changes, I've realized that when you have a beautiful ring with a diamond on it, it's hard not to still stare at it all the time. I'm still awestruck that Kevin trusted me with a diamond. ME?  Well, I'm honored to have his ring and the funniest thing is I used to tout in high school how I never looked at my nails like most girls do. I always had my palms up rather than down. With a ring, I've changed! I always look at my hand palms down! It's the ring I tell you. 

An update on wedding planning?

It's not stressing me out. Praise the Lord.  Invitations go out this weekend!

Addressed the invites with the help of two faithful friends with great penmanship! Tegan and Amanda thanks!  Here are some pics of Amanda and I stamping the invites. That's right! They're 100% homemade with Kinkos help=).

This week and last, I had some good company and great help from Amanda, Wing, and Te, all at different times to help me with invites.  Fun times =).

Writing!

It's 11:30am right now and I'm trying to finish at 10 page paper that's due today. Have class at 4pm an another assignment to complete so I'm going to keep this short. I'm done with the paper, only problem is I haven't read it through yet and revisions and citing articles always takes a long time. Just in case, you didn't know, I am currently getting my Masters in Public Health at UMCP.  Kevin is hard at work in his program in Elementary Education at UMCP as well. He graduates JULY 2nd and when that happens, we're going to have a big celebration. It's a huge accomplishment! 

As I'm writing my paper and apparently a blog entry, I'm listening to "Breathe Deep" a cd filled with the music of Hiram Ring, a college friend of mine.  Check him out at www.hiramring.com, buy his tunes on ITUNES, and if you're on the invite list to my wedding, then you should hear him there as well!  Alrighty, BACK TO WORK.

Stamps for an 18 year old!

Just went to buy stamps at the post office. Although there was a long line behind me, the USPS worker, who is getting married in June, talked to me for awhile. The way our conversation started was, "You're getting married? You're so young!". Apparently she thought I was 18 and getting married. Luckily her coworker thought I looked 24, which is not bad.  Really not bad.  

Anyways, a praise.  I can send all invitations using normal postage!  And thankfully I bought a billion FOREVER stamps so I can use them later on too.  RSVP stamps are little fruits! 

Are the invitations done yet?

Not quite but I have another great story to go with it.  I had hoped to print out my invitations on Monday and finish them by the end of the week. Today is Thursday night and as of Tuesday, I had printed my invitations but had made a small mistake. Yes, just a small one. I had printed 160 invitations with the words aligned about half an inch off. Not a big deal, but I was really frustrated with myself. Because I don't like to waste and the info on the messed up invitations was still accurate, I intended to keep the invitations. Kevin even helped to change the design to cover up the mess up. Unfortunately, this morning when I woke up I couldn't help agonizing inside about the invitations. I'll admit; I was obsessed. NO PEACE!

The fact is that I love cards. When I was in my senior year of high school I planned on studying graphic design with intentions of starting my own greeting  card line.  Obviously, I didn't go that direction, but I've still carried the same dream and the same passion for cards.  When you get a card, you feel special. If the card is designed well, you feel even better. In my eyes, I wanted to send an invitation card that not only made people feel special, but that whipped their bad day into a great one.

So to keep the story short, Kevin and my big big sister, Jo, convinced me to reprint the invitations (It was probably the agony in my voice that convinced them).  I was hesitant and I'm stubborn so I wasn't going to do it, but tonight at around 8:30pm  (Thursday) I drove to Kinkos once again... I've been there almost every day this week. Nice place, 24 hours by the way.

So Mr. Douglass from Kinkos was gracious enough to reprint the invitations for free. I didn't use any excuses or even try to convince him to reprint them.  I was actually planning to just redo the order. Not only did he reprint my invitations for free, but he printed the invitations immediately and offered to use their paper to print it, free of charge.  I decided to use my paper although I was unsure if I'd have enough left to print my last order.  Needless to say, things worked out perfectly.   Instead of having to come back Friday to check the order and then Saturday to pick up the entire job, I got all my invitations reprinted immediately FOR FREE and I got my reception cards printed out immediately as well. Couldn't get much better than that!  

WOOHOO. The verse to go along is  "O Lord, you have searched me and you know me." Think this was God's reminder to TRUST IN HIM.

A few words from the designer herself...

Spring break just started for me and I plan to print wedding invitations at Kinkos THIS WEEK> I'm currently designing the RSVP and reception cards on the fabulous Microsoft Word. Who know you could do it all on word? Anyways, the invitations are complete...in terms of the design...so I'm excited!  I love designing things and I love different types of paper and I love fonts and I love cards! In the process of designing the invites I've probably thought of 30 other designs so if anyone ever wants to use my word template and change it around a little I have ideas! I'm happy to say too that the invites will be handstamped and I didn't even have to buy it. (The things you can find when you're just looking around!)

I found this beautiful flower stamp in my sister's drawer and although I'm no stamper, I couldn't let it go. okay back to work. 

March already?

Today is Sunday, March 8th and I always try to make it my day of rest.  Set aside some time to hang out with Kevin today and although we've been dating for almost 3 years, our time together was just as or probably even more enjoyable than it was when we first started dating.  As we get closer and closer to our wedding, it seems like I become more and more thankful for our relationship and I guess I value it more.

Why am I thankful?  Okay here we go... just to name a few. 

1. I have someone who listens and cares and challenges me each day.

2. Our relationship has grown closer and progressed with each extra year we know each other. Just seems to get better.

3. I have the best family, parents, and church community that really support us and encourage us in our relationship.

4. We balance each other's weaknesses very well.

5. We think of crazy ideas together.

6. We have a whole lot of fun and laugh a lot at each other and with each other.

7. We've developed balance and self-control in terms of the boundaries in our relationship that's helped make our relationship healthy. 

8. The fact that I have great friends that also encourage me and understand me.  Can't just have a man..always need other people too. So I'm glad that I've learned that I need other people too! It's made my relationship with Kev even better.

Too many questions

I think the people who love weddings are the ones who aren't planning it. Seems to be the consensus that when you are actually planning a wedding it becomes stressful and a pain. I'm enjoying some parts of wedding planning, but not as much as I thought I would. It's like you take twice as long to plan an event than you would a typical event.  It's just because people have this fantasy type of idea that your wedding needs to be perfect.  When you're planning, I think you realize that all the fluff and stuff is pretty stupid.  Not to be harsh, but I'm guessing that people tend to make bad choices about marriage or tend to neglect their future marriage because they get so caught up in the hair and veil and color scheme. PLEASEEE... can we get some common sense in here?  What's the use of planning so much and stressing if it just makes you more uptight and anxious and unfocused about your wedding?  

HMMMM... I think the divorce rate is about 50% right now so if we're really realistic, you may be planning a wedding for a marriage that won't even last.  Some may say that's pessimistic and I admit, it could be, but in my opinion, most people are overly optomistic about relationship. When they start dating someone they say, he's the one or she's the one and they have no idea the number of issues that are between them and a great relationship.  

Part of me may be a little bitter because well, I have no time to enjoy planning my wedding. I was thinking of what the color scheme of my wedding would be, Kevin and my wedding, but unfortunately, it was in the middle of my studying. So while I was at the library, I got a little distracted and decided to find wedding books to think of the color and type of flowers I wanted for my wedding. CRAZINESS!! Well, here's to the next few months. I'm just letting go of the perfect wedding day and instead what I'm going for is a fun enjoyable day, with lots of celebration with fam and friends. 

Less than 6 months

Yesterday, was exactly six months from when Kevin and I will be married.  Hard to believe.  What amazes me though is how my wedding planning has turned out nothing like planned, but in many ways has been BETTER.  At first, I was going to modify my sister's wedding dress which my mom had made. Things didn't work out as planned, which was disappointing, and instead I ended up finding a GREAT deal at David's Bridal. I won't lie or even pretend I got it for full price but I got a dress on sale for $99 and it was marked down from $450. Can't beat that. Now while I didn't pray specifically for a dress, I did pray for my wedding planning and after the idea to modify my mom's dress didn't quite work out, I did kinda ask God not expecting anything really for a dress, whether borrowed or rented or bought. Love the dress though. Simple, different, and right for me.

In many other parts of my planning, things have worked out the same. Just better than I could expect. 

Winter Reading

So in effort to keep perspective on why I'm planning a wedding, my goal while I am on my winter break is to read marriage books.  I used to think of marriage books as something for old Christian women and men and honestly, I had no desire to touch them, but my aunt and uncle from Toronto gave me this marriage book and the font was right size and the book was new so I decided I'd start reading that one.

I've read up to page 50 so far it seems that this book is alot less about marriage than I thought.  It's more about how to follow God and little inserts about marriage are added in.  I used to think I shouldn't read a book about marriage until I actually get married, but now that I'm reading, I'm thinking that my goal to learn about marriage BEFORE marriage is actually a really good decision. Thinking back, I read a number of dating books even though I didn't have a boyfriend and never had had one before and I tend to think that doing so, helped me be more cautious and wise when it came time to date. So I'm hoping and I think it's true that if I read about marriage before it actually happens, I'll be much more prepared, a better wife (did I just say that?), and just more aware of what is ahead. 

What is ahead? Well, from what I've been reading and through my reflection, I'm thinking, just thinking and realizing that when people say marriage is hard, it really is very very very hard. Now, I feel like playing hockey in college was one of the toughest things for me emotionally and physically, and caring for my grandparents has been pretty tough as well, and training for a marathon wasn't that hard, but I'm starting to see that I'm going to be crying, yelling, fighting, hurting because marriage really will be that hard.  At the same time, I've been really comforted and excited because I'm seeing that marriage, if it is approached at from God's angle it can be REALLY REALY satisfying and can add so much to your life.  

So we'll see what happens after page 50, but I've shocked myself because I haven't read this faithfully in a while!

What do you know? Over a DRESS!!

So one thing that I've been realizing all today and yesterday is that my vision seems to have gotten a lot worse. At work and even now as I type, I feel like my eyes aren't able to see the words too clearly. I hope and pray that I keep my eyesight.  WIth contacts most people think I'm 20/20, but actually I'm legally blind without corrective vision. I always wondered why God would give me bad eyesight...after all, I got my first pair of glasses when I was 3, but I guess we'll have to wait and see God's plan. Inside I'm learning that if I go blind, then I go blind and I won't cause a ruckus over it. There must be some purpose for it. 

Well, since this is a blog dedicated to my engagement, today I went to Kinkos after work. I didn't plan on it but went on a whim because I just felt like going there to check out the prices. I think I'm a "on the whim" type of person, no matter how disciplined I may be at times.  Yesterday as I was looking at the invitations I had bought, I realized that it would be pretty hard to print my own invitations even though a whole kit was provided.  Using the invitations i've already bought, I'd have to manually feed like 200 invitations into our printer plus manually feed RSVP cards and the such. Not much fun. So I went to Kinkos to look into printing my own.

After a quick trip to Kinkos, I snuck over to David's Bridal although I didn't have my bridal party members, my sister, or anyone with me and decided I was going to try on a couple of dresses. I think I tend to buy better when I'm alone. There was noone to give strong opnions or any opinion at all or anyone to take many pictures for me. In fact, the lady who helped me out took pictures on my cell phone for me because I hadn't planned on coming.  While I hate to obsess over petty things like a dress which I'll only wear for ONE DAY, I have been stressing over this. First, it was over my bridesmaid dresses and this time it was over a wedding dress. For the past few weeks I've been searching online and thinking about where I was going to find my bridesmaid dress and then my wedding dress. Last week, I confirmed my bridesmaid dress and it had been killing me that I didn't know what I was going to wear yet.  I think i just like to get things done quickly. 

So I can't forget to mention that in my stress I did halfhearted ask God to help me.  That's all, I asked him just to help me because I couldn't believe I was letting a dress stress me out, but when I tried on the two dresses, which let me say were  $99, they both ended being pretty beautiful. I liked them at least. And so I called my sister who willingly bussed her two kids with her to David's Bridal, and then I called Kevin who was just about to eat and put down his fork to come take a look, and then I called my mom, who was on the road and without hesitation, turned the car around and said she would be at David's Bridal in minutes... I called them to get their input and literally in less than 2-3 hours, I literally found a dress that fit my strict criteria...something inexpensive and beautiful.  Can't get much better than that!